Thursday, February 1, 2018

Random : Managing Long Distance Relationship and Becoming International Couple?


Hello guys, welcome back again to my blog! I never update random talking blog post like this since long time ago. I never update much about my love life on my social media or update so many photos just like other couples might do. I don't think updating or over share too much on internet is a good thing, especially talking about our personal stuff.

But today, I might share something a little bit personal thing. Yeap, from the title you already know that I am going to talk about my relationship. My boyfriend is sleeping now in his house, in Korea. Meanwhile I am still awake in my own room, in Indonesia. So better I make a random talking blog post and you guys can learn something from our journey. Actually we never know until when we are going to be together, but we are actually thinking about the next step and mentioning that "next step" several times in our conversation. Still,... no one knows what will happen next in our life right?

If some of you are not following my instagram and never watch my instagram live video, you probably don't know that we both are having different nationality. I am Indonesian and he is korean. Nothing like korean drama, everything is honestly difficult to maintain long distance relationship and living as international couple. We fight a lot about small things that I never think those are big problems and vice versa. Cultural differences are a bit hard to manage actually, because we see things differently. For example: Usually in my home, we are cleaning up together. My mom will clean up her room, me and my brother'll clean up our own room, and later we clean all parts in the house together. Meanwhile, when I slept over in his house and with his family... because I am the youngest, I need to offer myself to do so many things because that's basic manner in korean society. In my home, we never thought that the youngest must do or offer all housework / other works. Because my parents told me about being "equal".

Yea, something like that... sometimes we fight about simple thing like that lol. 

We met accidentally. We never have mutual friends. We don't have anything in common especially in hobby or the way we dressing up. I really care about fashion items and how I look if I am going out. Meanwhile he always told me that he is fashion terrorist ahahahaha. He loves extreme sport and I don't. I prefer sit and drink coffee in cafe, listening to indie music or YG artists' songs.

It was just like magic? We met just like that. After 2 weeks of chatting. He was discovering me from instagram and he said that he already followed me for quite some times.

He used to live in Indonesia for working of his father's company. He stayed in here for 2 years and he can speak a little bit Bahasa Indonesia, at least for daily conversation.. he's pretty good.

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Long distance relationship as a tough one for sure. Actually I am typical person that can wait and do something else to make me not really feel lonely / being trap with emotional feeling. But I know that guys in general are also really hard managing relationship. Because guys are more physically attract to women. We experience a broke up when we almost hit 300 days in relationship. It was bad in emotional and crushing my heart into pieces because I give all that I have to maintain this relationship. I don't necessarily need to mention a complete info,... I believe every break up is sad or it will make you feel lonely after several months or even after several days from the break up day.

We came back together because actually we were always in a serious relationship and I honestly love his soul. I ever thinking for not coming back, but after I talked with his mom and him on night in his apartment in Suwon... I am considering it again. How many days we've been together? When this post is getting published, we will hit 474 days for being together. 


Tips in managing "long distance relationship"? Trust and keep communicating. Please keep communicating. At least saying "good morning, I am going to work and will finish at.... pm. I will contact you after work." it doesn't hurt you right? It will make your other half happy to see your message or call everyday. I don't really hold him too much, he can go to work, hangout and drink soju with his friends or his family. Because I always go out with my friends, working, and also have my own time with myself. 

I never imagine that I will meet him or having another korea boyfriend (because my last ex boyfriend is also korean). I don't even know how to continue this random blog post. Yea, pretty much.... having korean boyfriend is not the same as being inside of korean drama. You need to please his mother as well with ability of understanding korean culture including korean language and how to cook well. You also need to be smart at least for surviving in your own life, living with her son, and maybe having a kid in the future. Taking a korean mother's heart is not easy at all. I never try so hard on his family too. I am just being me, explaining that I was a good student in my university, and coming from a good background. No need to be worry if your son is dating with me.

Same as Indonesian parents are pretty strict about "having a relationship with foreigner". My boyfriend needs to take my parents' heart and show them that he is a responsible man. Say sorry if we are coming back late, drop me at my house if it's already late at night, say hi to my parents if they joined the video call, impress them with good attitude, and because my family is Christian.... he needs to show respect for our family's belief. 

It's hard but we never regret that we met. We learn a lot from each other. I hope we can grow up together in age, experience, and carrier. Saving a lot of money for the future and live happily. I don't know how future welcome us, but we are not just boyfriend and girlfriend, we are best friends and family.

2 comments:

  1. cuties <3

    cheer, Michelle ~ https://livedreammagic.blogspot.co.id

    ReplyDelete
  2. I understand you. It is difficult to have international relations. Wish you happiness!

    ReplyDelete